The LOZfest
by SorrowsTear
Summary: ....M'kay peepalopes....Chappie 2ie is uppie *Yays* R+R...Or I'll glue you to a wall *Evil threatening stare*
1. Default Chapter

**L.O.Z fest**

*Screen fizzles in*

Nox: Welcome

Magnus: To

Aquarius: The

Tera: LOZfest!!!

Sorrow: Hello my name is Sorrow, some of you unlucky souls may remember a "Dranzer" and more recently a "Enhanced", Both of those people are me...This story is a better version of explicit content...Hopefully it won't be a load of crap, but only time will tell....

1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2

Link: *in his room, blasting murderdolls at dangerously high volumes and head banging*

Saria: LINK! KEEP IT DOWN! YOUR SCARING THE ANIMALS!!!!

Link: FINE! *turns off his cd player* I'll go to the old wind temple *grabs a skate board on the way out and leaves*

Saria: ....When will he learn? *runs up to Link's "house" and goes through his wallet* ....Finally I can afford the nice toilet paper *leaves with 500 rupees*

Later at the wind temple

Zelda: *in gothic attire* this sucks...Impa kicked me out...the music was to "loud"

Link: *working on his ollie* Yeah, but what ya gonna do?

Gannondorf: *in a Soil hoodie and ridiculously baggy jeans* Why don't we go to OZZfest?

Tingle: I have maps!!! Tingle tingle culoo limpa!! *lands a triple variable heal flip*

Skullkid: *grinding on one of the huge swords left behind by the wind sage* even if we "do" have maps...We can't afford it *bails and falls face first onto a pile of broken glass* Ouch

All 'cept Skullkid: hah

Nox: *drifts from one of the elemental gems* .....Hey look....Its the people that left my great grandfather to die and couldn't be arsed to free his descendants...How's it going?

Link: But we talked to Dran about a month ago....

Nox: Time flies in our world

All: I see

Nox: Anyway...*pulls 5 OZZfest tickets out of her pocket* Enjoy *Disappears in a swirl of gray light*

All: WOO *a statue of Dranzer collapses* ....Urm? ()_()" *All Slowly Depart*

1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2

Sorrow: Liked? Hated? Not Bothered? Review anyhow...Any suggestions for songs on the first stage at the "LOZfest"? Black Sabbath's up first....so what's your favorite song by that particularly great band...Let me know and I'll be zelda-fy-ing it...Make's no sense? Read EC....And

Nox: Goodbye

Magnus: From

Aquarius: Us

Tera: Till

All 'cept Sorrow: Next Time!!!!

*screen fizzles out*


	2. Not So Default Chapter

**LOZfest**

*Screen fizzles in*

Sorrow: Thanks for the reviews guys....All you others...For shame...And as for the who is M, A, N and T question...You'll find out in a later story....Now...Onto the Sabbath stage...

1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2

Link, Zelda, Gannondorf, Tingle and Skullkid walk in through the VIP entrance and happen to be just by the Sabbath stage.

All: Cool

Ozzy: *Walks up to the mike* Is-is-is th-this o...on? Is it F***in' on? JACK!

Jack: *Runs on and flicks the on switch* There Dad

Ozzy: -.- Stupid Switch...K Hyrule, this first song is called Moblins...So get those hands up and make some noise!!!

Crowd: *Mexican wave around "pit"* Yay

Ozzy: Villains gathered in their masses  
Just like Stalfos at black masses  
Gannon's mind that plots destruction  
A sorcerer of death's construction  
In the fields the bodies burning as the war machine keeps turning  
Death and hatred to mankind  
Poisoning their pig like minds... Oh lord yeah!  


*Picture of Hyrule Castle on fire on the OHP, followed by a Stalchild kicking a guard into the moat*

  
Dungeon bosses hide themselves away  
They only started the war  
Why should they go out to fight?  
They leave that role to the poor

*Shows all the bosses in the "dark world", Dark Link turns and terminates the camera*  
  
Time will tell on his power mind  
Making war just for fun  
Treating others just like pawns in chess  
Wait 'till his judgment day comes, Oh yeah!

*Close up of Gannon*  
  
Now in darkness, world stops turning  
as the Castle is no longer burning  
No more moblins of the power  
Hand of Link has struck the hour  
Day of judgment, Link is calling on their knees, the moblins crawling  
Begging mercy for their sins  
Gannon, laughing, spreads his wings  
ALL RIGHT NOW!

*Link finishing of Gannon and in the background a larger Gannon with wings twirling souls around his little finger*

Link: That was so COOL *jumps up and down like a hyper bunny*

Gannondorf: -.-

Ozzy: Ohkay Ohkay....Next...Urm? BOB? What's next?

Bob: *Runs out and whispers to Ozzy*

Ozzy: Can we play that?

Bob: *Nods*

Ozzy: Ohkay...Next up...Iron Knuckle/Super Dark Nut...

Has he lost his mind?  
Can he see or is he blind?  
Can he walk at all,  
Or if he moves will he fall?  
Is he alive or dead?  
Has he thoughts within his head?  
We'll just pass him there  
why should we even care?  


*OHP shows a suit of armour, standing alone in a dusty corner of a museum*

  
He was turned to steel  
By Gannon's feared magnetic field  
When he traveled time  
To destroy the future of mankind

*The Armour's eyes ignite*  
  
Nobody wants him  
He just stares at the world  
Planning his vengeance  
that he will soon unfurl  
  
Now the time is here  
for Super Dark Nut to spread fear  
Vengeance from the grave  
Kills the people he once saved

*The armour charges around with a bloody mace in hand, swinging it a people and pillars, bringing them crashing to the floor*  
  
Nobody wants him  
They just turn their heads  
Nobody helps him  
Now he has his revenge  
  
Heavy boots of lead  
fills his victims full of dread  
Running as fast as they can  
Iron Knuckle lives again!

*Shows N64 Iron Knuckle exploding and a Wind Waker Dark Nut towering over Link*

Gannondorf: Woooo

Skullkid: *Hiding behind Tingle* is it over?

Zelda: *Creeps up behind him* Boo?

Skullkid: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAah *jumps*

All 'cept Skullkid: Hah

Ozzy: *drinking from a starbucks cup* refreshing....Well this last song...is called taking my life to live....

OHS: OZZfest sponsored by Starbucks Coffee...

Ozzy: Well people look and people stare  
Well I don't think you even care  
You fight your life away and what does she give?  
You're only taking my life to live  
Taking my life to live  
Taking my life to live

*Shows a fairy flying around Link and fading out*  
  
Take a look around, what do you see?  
The poor, the dead and misery  
It's not the way that the world was meant  
It's a pity you don't understand  
Taking my life to live  
Taking my life to live

*Shows the market of Adult Link, all the Redeads are on fire*  
  
I'm telling you  
Believe fairies  
Nobody else will tell you  
Open your eyes  
And see the lies, oh yeah

*Link in a Great Fairy shrine, his eyes doing the "shocked" look*

  
You think I'm crazy and baby  
I know that it's true  
Before that you know it I think  
That you'll go crazy too  
  
I don't know if I'm up or down  
Whether black is white or blue is brown  
The colors of my life are all different somehow  
Little boy blue's a big girl now  
  
So you think it's me who's strange  
But you've never had to make the change  
Never give your trust away  
You'll end up paying till your dying day

*Shows Link, lying on the floor, a sword through his chest and a fairy flying of with his money*

Ozzy: Thanks for coming Pig F***ers!!!

Link: That song sucked old school!

Tingle: So many fairies, I must fly with them!

All 'cept Tingle: o.O Eh?

Zelda: Oh well...So where next?!?

The Zelda crew head off into the crowd towards the next big band...

1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2 1+1=2

Sorrow: Ohkay...This time...You, the reviewers get to pick the band that's playing next...Kewl? You bet...If I get enough feedback I could have another chapter up by Sunday...Half 6 ENGLISH time....Till next time

*Screen fizzles out, leaving Sorrow*

Sorrow: Not cool

*Exits, stage left*

  



End file.
